Seth Meyers

“The University of Texas has decided to allow students to carry guns in the classroom. The school says it’s a guaranteed way to prevent the possibility of a pop quiz.” – Seth Meyers

Jimmy Fallon

“Bernie Sanders is getting the support of students at Hillary Clinton’s alma mater, Wellesley College. Now Hillary Clinton is trying to get the support of Bernie’s alma mater, Jurassic Park.” – Jimmy Fallon